I take a month off and this is what happens?

It seems like everywhere I look lately someone is taking shots at the profession. Apparently we are trying to melt people and cars with our concave skyscraper designs while frying eggs on the sidewalk (See exhibit A). Although clearly we were just kidding about that, because all of our designs are really meant to be taken as farce. We’re the new comedians! We’re ironically iconic (see exhibit B)!

We’re just trying to be the best designers we can. But, you try to save one tree on the site of the church your designing and suddenly everyone is all “Oh my, that looks like a giant penis” if you happen to view it on google earth. Hilarious! (See exhibit C). Well at least we didn’t locate the fire hydrant exactly at the tip of the vaguely penis shaped form. Oh wait, we did (See exhibit D). Nice job.

Yay! Architecture is phallic! What a surprise. What a great story that makes. But, it’s so “old school”, don’t you think?

Maybe we could interest you in something more contemporary and feminine? Perhaps something with a few more curves and a suggestive opening in the middle? (See exhibit E). Brilliant! It’s a giant steel vagina and it’s full of handsome sweating men playing with their balls… Hahahahahahahahha… Maybe this will get us some much needed national attention (See exhibit G).

Ok. Clearly we are not doing a good job representing our profession in the national media. Maybe architects are not telling our own story very effectively.

Perhaps there’s a work of literature that could help? Say, something about an architect (and/or F-head) so attached to his ideals that he would rather destroy his work than allow it’s perfection to be compromised by someone who thinks he owns it just because he paid for it. That would be perfect. (See exhibit H).

Or, we could get someone else to speak for us. Is there’s a wealthy media mogul or hip-hop artist out there with more than a passing interest in the profession who could stand up and speak for us? Brad Pitt certainly tried and failed. Wait. I know, maybe Kanye can help. He designed some shoes didn’t he? I bet he loves to “hang out with architects, mostly”, because architects “wanna make things as dope as possible”, right?  (see exhibit I). Oooo! Maybe Kanye could teach a Harvard and tell us how “the world can be saved through design, and everything needs to actually be ‘architected'” (see Exhibit I give up)

I don’t think I’ve seen architects get this much attention in years. And, I just think it’s wonderfu…of what the hell is wrong with us?

Is this the image we want to paint of the profession? Are we just a bunch of egomaniacal individualist creative types only interested in our own, clearly superior, phallic/vaginal delusions of grandeur?

The answer to that is “no” by the way.

But, it doesn’t make as good of a story.

And to be honest, until we give the media something better to talk about…

they’re just going to run with the story about the church that’s shaped like a dick.

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Wells Cathedral Plan – which appears to have some sort of growth. You should get that checked out.

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The photo of the Eiffel tower looking all tall and suggestive has been used under the creative commons license. Original can be found HERE.