A belated respond to your lovely note “Dear Architects, I am sick of your shit” that I found here – ( pg.1 – pg.2 ) Hey Annie, I know it’s been a while, I’m sorry about that. I was really busy. At least until 2009, then not so much… I just wanted to say, you were right. I’ve wasted 18 years … Read More
Unexpected ways to finish Stainless Steel
Unexpected ways to finish Stainless Steel: Brushed with greatness Rubbed the wrong way With Oil and garlic With lemon juice and angst With an “e” Bead blasted or bedazzled Acid-tongue etched Veneered Without asking her As if your life depended on it Next to a three-legged dog On fire With very little concern for the safety of the children…the children, … Read More
Architects at 3am
There’s a rumor floating around that Architect’s pull all-nighters. Especially while they’re in school. Apparently, we do our best work at 3am. The creative juices are just begining to flow; your design skills are at their peak. Seriously, at 3 am, you are on fire. I’m not going to confirm or deny this rumor. Let’s just say: At 3am I’ve … Read More
Very Model of a Modern Architectural
. Ok people…Take your places. This is the final dress rehearsal before tonight’s performance. Devon, Trevor, Justin – places please. Javier, the turtleneck, please put it on, no one needs to see your pecks. Justine, stop fidgeting. C.K. Howell? are you ready? Ok, from the top. Lights! Music swells…. THE ARCHITECT (bi-speckled and aloof): I am the very model of … Read More
Architects, Do Better
Congratulations Architects, you have the luxury of cynicism. So, I just finished a cute post about Architects being pantless Aliens -which was fun, mainly because I got to use the phrase “insecure and arrogant at the same time”. Aren’t I awesome for coming up with that? What an edgy, blogger I am, taking on the big issues. Yep, that’s … Read More
Architectural Encounters of the Third Kind
Mr. Jared Johnson is not fond of exaggerations. We consider him to be a level-headed man, short of temper, but, seldom prone to elaborate fabrications. So when Mr. Johnson disappeared last Thursday, we were concerned. Then his arrival in town yesterday wearing only a turtleneck and a cowboy hat, did little to alleviate our concern. His story is hard to believe. I know he has … Read More
When you’re an Architect
Don’t get me wrong. I absolutely love being an Architect. I’ve been an Architect almost as long as I haven’t been an Architect (don’t try to do the math, please) and at this point I really can’t imagine doing anything else. Actually, I can’t imagine “being” anything else. It’s become more than a profession. It’s become part of the definition … Read More
The Death of Modern
. Modern was probably dead to begin with. But, in his youth, he achieved fame by removing elements, simplifying, and arranging order. We were infatuated with his purity. With Modern, we stood in front of a blank canvas that seemed to clear away our past regressions, and promised a future of precision and clarity. Modern was singular and lovely, like … Read More
On a deserted island?
Lets assume you’re on a deserted island. Shipwrecked. Plane crashed next to Amelia Earhart. Somewhere in the Pacific. Small island. You can see from one side to the other. Not big. You might have a volleyball and fedex package. And coconuts, I’d assume. Maybe a stick to poke at fish. And some thatch (what the hell is thatch anyway?). You’d … Read More
Ravenous band of Architects attack Thomas Kinkade
. According to a hospital official, Thomas Kinkade’s condition is no longer considered critical. Mr. Kinkade has been released from the ICU and is expected to make a full (all be it painfully slow) recovery. An official spokesman for the Kinkade estate would not confirm the nature of the attack, however several eyewitnesses collaborate the allegations that a band of ravenous … Read More
A talk with Louis Kahn that probably did not occur
. I may or may not have spoken with Louis Kahn. Late 20th century icon of American Architecture. Master of putting a square thing inside of a round thing, and a round thing inside a square thing. Also adept at adding triangular openings in the round thing or square thing, and sometimes he put a shallow arched opening in the square … Read More
Dear Modernism
Dear Modernism, This year I would like a frameless glass sauna and a black river stone contemplation room. My friend Timmy said you don’t exist. He said you’re just an ideal state made up by the grown-ups to keep us from making a mess. He said you died in the 60s, and the grown-ups are just afraid to tell us … Read More